Meditations of a Bored Breastfeeder

(Yawn.) Looks like the kid is almost asleep. (Gazing around the room) Wish I could watch TV, but the remote is over on top of the entertainment center. Huh. I guess I could lug both of us over there, but it sure sounds like a lot of work. (Pause) Kind of makes you wish you had the ability to levitate things by thinking at them hard enough. (Staring hard enough to make eyes cross) I wonder why, with all the cool things in the human body, God couldn’t have stuck that little ability in there too. (Reflection) I guess we’d all be lazy and really fat, if we never had to move to get anything done. Sure would be easy to clean the house, though. Wow, this kid eats a lot. (Staring bemusedly down at said kid) I wonder if it is healthy to feed him ALL THE TIME like he demands. (Lift hand to gently poke one plush cheek) Sure is cute. (Contortion to kiss said cheek. Exertive sigh.) I wonder if God designed the body to produce oxytocin during breastfeeding to relax you for the purpose that you don’t get antsy and quit feeding your kid before he’s done. (Yawn.) Makes me tired. (Sleepy blink.) I wish I had something to do, but I seem to lack the motivation to get it. I wonder if other moms get sort of bored like me if when you forgot to have something on hand before you sit down…but they probably don’t end up thinking about levitation. I’m probably just weird. Think I’m going to go lay this kid down now…